Passing the buck

Some of you may know that I run a bar in Stratford just 10 mins from my house and unofficial office of Umlaut Records. Sounds fun right? Well actually yeah, it is pretty damn fun 70% of the time, spending evenings sampling new booze lines and hanging off the end of the bar talking to all walks of life who enter the building. But 30% of the time, well fuck me that's just the most boring times of all. You can't leave to get lunch as you're maybe the only person in at this time of day (Wednesday daytimes are a ghost town) so instead I would endeavour to make lunches for myself. FAIL!!! I don't have time for that in the morning. No really all I end up doing is buying boxes of shortbread and eating this throughout the day. But then after a box or so, we'll your mouth starts to get pretty dry. So of course I reach for the soft drinks since it's the daytime and I am at work I probably shouldn't be drinking alcohol. But then now I've eaten a box or two of shortbread which is full of sugar and a glass of coke which is HELLA full of sugar. Too much stimulant at one time. So what could I possibly do to bring this all down while I'm alone in a bar?? You guessed it, and now what started off as a well intentioned way to eat healthily and consistently over the week has led to borderline alcoholism at the age of 33. Shortbread, like so many other delightfully packaged goods in the modern age is inevitably to blame for the downfall of civilised society, starting with a 30 something sat in bed at 2:30 in the afternoon writing garbage. God help us